I have written to several people about this and thought it right to alert you, as the lactivist, to something that has completely appalled me. The article in this month’s Mother & Baby magazine (July 2010)
“I bottle-fed. So what?” In which a mother chose to formula feed from
birth because “I wanted my body back (And some wine)… I also wanted to give my boobs at least chance to stay on my chest rather than dangling around my stomach”. She goes on to say “They’re part of my sexuality, too
- not just breasts, but fun bags. And when you have that attitude (and I admit I made no attempt to change it), seeing your teeny, tiny, innocent baby latching on where only a lover has been before feels, well, a little
creepy. I don’t think I’m the only one, either – only 52% of mums still breastfeed after six weeks. Ask most of the quitters why they stopped and you’ll hear tales of agonising three-hour feeding sessions and – the
drama! – bloody nipples. But I often wonder whether many of these women, like me, just couldn’t be fagged or felt like getting tipsy once in a while”
On the matter of the positive aspects of breastfeeding, she said: “…
there are all the studies that show [breastfeeding] reduces the risk of breast cancer for you, and stomach upsets and allergies for your baby. But even the convenience and supposed health benefits of breastmilk couldn’t
induce me to stick my nipple in a bawling baby’s mouth.”
In all, this diabolical article is summed up in her own words:
“Breastfeeding: the most natural thing in the world. But what if, like me,
you don’t really fancy it?”
I am completely appalled, this woman is none other than the deputy editor of Mother & Baby magazine (though this is not made clear in the article – the picture used and header “Viewpoint” would have you believe it were a
regular reader writing in).
This surely cannot be allowed, for a woman in her position to be so unapologetically negative regarding breastfeeding, sneering at breastfeeding mothers and generally spreading misinformation.
Even if nothing can be done, I think it is appropriate to alert the breastfeeding community that Mother & Baby magazine are quite obviously pro-formula (I counted no less than 16 formula/bottle feeding advertisements – some of which directly targetted breastfeeders).
Sincerely,
Elle
Update on the 22nd June by Lactivist Admin
I set up a facebook group – Mother-and-Baby-Magazine-please-support-breastfeeding and in a day it had more members than the Mother and Baby facebook group!
The Editor of Mother and Baby has responded on that page:
“This is Miranda Levy, the editor of Mother & Baby.The lady who set up this page is reacting to a one-page opinion feature in our July issue by a writer who – for reasons explained in the piece – decided to go straight to bottle-feeding. This was her personal experience, and certainly has a place in the ongoing parenting debate. We have been inundated by supportive emails applauding her ‘refreshing’ point of view: we have made readers feel ‘normal’ and less of a ‘failure’ for managing to breastfeed -a situation which is incredibly common.
I’d also like to point out instances where we do support breastfeeding – in the May issue we had a 6 page special on getting started and sticking with it, July has a one-pager on the best breastpumps, and in August we’ll be running a trouble-shooting feature about problems in the early days.
The way you feed your baby is not a moral issue, and at Mother & Baby we seek to support all new parents in what is a glorious, but often difficult and emotional time.
Many thanks
Miranda Levy”
I am so impressed with the strength of opinions and responses to this campaign. And it is not just the ‘breastfeeding mafia’ that think the article is derogatory, a formula mum has also posted in to complain about it.
Maybe, just maybe we can all make a difference here.
Lisa
This is why I boycotted M&B, right back when my eldest was a baby (6yrs ago) I gave up getting the mag because it was so full of formula and bottle ads, and rarely anything about breastfeeding, unless it happened to be negative (like a mum’s ‘harrowing ordeal’ of trying and quitting BFing for example). That plus all the ads for soothers, push chairs, cots, cribs, bumbos, baby walkers, etc etc, and accompanying ‘best buy’ articles and review lists for lots of expensive items that promote detachment parenting.
More recently I will hide M&B mags at the back of shelves, and move The Green Parent mags to the front, prominent spot.
It is disgusting that anyone can hold those attitudes, let alone an editor of a baby parenting magazine.
The sentence about not putting the crying baby to the breast was gut wrenching.
I would love nothing more than for this magazine and many like it to be closed down, and production/publishing ceased. We can live in hope.
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Heinous. If I had a subscription to that magazine, I would cancel it on the spot, telling the editors why in no uncertain terms. I posted the article and your comments to my Facebook page, and I hope they go viral.
What a horrible, horrible attitude to take. I wonder what other aspects of parenting she finds inconvenient or creepy?
I pumped milk exclusively for my first daughter for a year (it’s a long story) and for her two younger siblings, nursed each until they were almost three. I did not see this as inconvenient or creepy. I saw it as motherhood. That editor needs some big-girl pants.
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That is truely awful. What a vile and vuglar woman!
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This seems to be a growing attitude with women in todays society. Breasts have become so over sexualized that alot of women are forgetting thier real purpose. For the editor of a magazine to be writing this article is what is really creepy.
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that is disgusting, i myself couldnt breastfeed although it was something i truly wanted to do, to not want to feed your baby because she wanted a glass of wine is appaling. what does she think motherhood is about? it means giving up your wine and often enough sacraficing your ‘perfect’ body for your child. maybe she should take a step back and look at herself and wonder if she really is the best person to be a deputy of a baby magazine if she has such narrow-minded opinions
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What a shame that she has such a negative opinion of breast feeding ..I loved breastfeeding..this magazine would do more good giving decent information on how to breastfeed successfully .. I had no pain whatsoever and I fully believe that this was down to reading a wonderful article that showed exactly how to latch on properly I breastfed for only just over 3 months but I only stopped because my son had very bad colic and I wanted to try some colic milk as other remedies had not solved it for him.. but it was lovely to be so close to my son and provide him with the best start in life I could.. I don’t judge people who can’t feed but think these comments suggest that this woman values a drink more than her own child ..and agree that the magazine should be more representative and cater for all parents ..I would question where the statistics came from too..
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This woman clearly lacks natural motherly instincts! We have boobs for our babies, not for our sex lives. The pain n uncomfort is worth it a million times over knowing ur child can go to sleep n the dangers of cot death are significantly reduced. And as for alcohol, as a parent u give up a lot naturally, a few glasses of wine is a very little sacrifice!
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I don’t mind this woman having a personal opinion and expressing it (and I suspect that it’s one shared by an increasing number of women). Women believe these myths not because they are bad mothers but because of the pervasive sexalisation of breasts as well as the bottle feeding culture that permeates our society.
What I do object to is a magazine presenting opinion as fact.
There’s no evidence to suggest that breastfeeding causes saggy boobs – pregnancy (hormones & weight gain), age, sun damage and smoking all contribute to sagging boobs.
And it’s perfectly possible for most mothers to have an alcoholic drink or two whilst breastfeeding and if drinking to excess then they can always express enough milk for whilst they are inebriated.
It’s sad that someone who is in a position to find out the information and present it to her readers instead presents her own opinion as fact.
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I’m a peer supporter, and am feeding a 1yr old and 4yr old (occasionally). So I’m very definitely in the pro-breastfeeding camp. It also drives me wild when the media insist on polarising the ‘debate’ about breastfeeding (there isn’t really a debate, considering all the evidence is in favour, but still) and seek to demonise one side or the other. I’m also a campaigner for good information and proper support for everyone wanting to breastfeed. But, and it’s a wary but, if this is the way someone feels, does it help to flame her for it? Yes, I think it’s an abuse of her position (particularly when it isn’t made clear who she is) to publish such a strident article and I wish it wasn’t out there. We can rail against the society that made her consider her breasts as mainly decorative. We can correct her when she declares that breastfeeding (rather than pregnancy) changes breast shape. But I’m not sure that personal attacks are going to get us anywhere, and I’ve spoken to women who just never felt comfortable breastfeeding, and said it was a relief to stop and they only really bonded with their baby when they had. It makes me sad, but it doesn’t make them crap mothers. I also vigorously support free speech, as long as I’m equally free to challenge what’s said.
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I agree completely with Hannah. Everyone is entitles to their own opinion but to share if with obviously some force and to publish it is completely unacceptable. I agree with free speech however and so for that reason I would say a balanced argument has to be presented and a response to this article printed should be published next month. On a personal level I don’t think bottle feeding should be looked down on as second best but I feel sorry for those who find breastfeeding hard and choose not too as the one thing I would have said made up for all the crying and sleepless nights is the fantastic feeling when your baby latches on and the knowledge that you alone are nourishing them.
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Does this woman even have a baby?!? Could be just opinion-making… Disgusting, one way or the other.
I enjoy b(r)e(a)stfeeding and no-one but my baby will stop me.
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I have no problem with people talking honestly about their feelings about breastfeeding – negative or positive. But I think M&B magazine shouldn’t publish comments where people rubbish the benefits of breastfeeding or imply that it ruins your breasts without including some editorial content giving readers access to the FACTS about these things, so people can set these opinions in context. Against the background of a society where breastfeeding is already so misunderstood and so poorly supported articles like this are horribly damaging.
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Wasn’t Mother & Baby the magazine that “dared” to have a breastfeeding mother and baby on the front cover a few months back..? Perhaps this is their way of redressing the balance and keeping their advertisers happy. *tongue in cheek*
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I was sickened by this article, as a first time mum I already knew that I wanted to breastfeed my baby. I was lucky, my husband and family are veery supportive and my mother in law gave me a fantastic book which really helped with any problems I had.
There is enough social pressure against breastfeeding as it is, although I think this is changing, without stupid selfish articles like this.
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I breast fed my 3 children, my oldest is 20 and my youngest is 15 and at 45 I still have boobs to be proud of.
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i am utterley disgusted by this article in any piece of media! never mind a mother and baby mag which newly pregnant women probs most commonly buy! im a breastfeeding supporter too and comments like that is what horrifies mums and pregnant women as they are often the only myths they think they know about, as if we havent got enogh crap coming from some health professionals (i said some, dont jump on me, ive learnt from experience) why would they not believe in a “reliable” magazine? thats costs so much too! is there any board to report this too? i we be wanting to hid any copy of this magazine in any supermarket i go in2! im currently pregnant with my 2nd so using it to my advantage and promoting bf to as many other pregnant moms as pos, my work never stops even though im on mat leave!
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I cannot believe that it is legal for someone in her position to produce that article. The benefits of breastfeeding are endless and anyone who puts having a drink before the health of their child should never have had a baby in the first place, and should surely not be working for a baby orientated magazine! I will certainly never buy this magazine again
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Oh dear. Once again the BF lobby shows it total lack of sense of humour and misses the point somewhat.
Clearly it was meant to a *tongue in cheek* piece in defence of women who, for whatever reason, choose to bottle feed. And, having read the piece in the mag before this furore, from a woman who I suspect is rather on the defensive having been criticised.
Those mothers who bottle feed from choice are NOT feeding their babies poison for goodness sake! I have both breastfed and bottlefed from birth and I have to say that for me, the main issue with bottle feeding was the inference that I was somehow doing the worst for my child. In reality, I simply couldnt cope with the demand of 2 hourly feeding and 2 older children, the house, trying to keep my marriage going etc. So when my 4th child was born it was a no brainer. And yes, I did appreciate the fact that my other half could feed the baby and I could have a glass of wine now and then, but it wasnt my deal breaker!
Please, do try and accept that we all make our choices for whatever reason we see fit, and ty to support other mothers no matter how they choose to feed their babies. Us women, mothers or not, have enough to deal with in this mans world without us turning on each other over our feeding methods!
Come on sisters, lets look at the big picture. Will it really matter that your daughter was breast fed when she can’t get a job because in her field she is outnumbered by men 10 to 1? Or is raped by a man who gets away with it because the CPS wont send it to court and if it does by some miracle get there, he is aqquited by a male dominated jury? Lets look after each other, whatever we choose, please? Our children are the new generation and the best gift we can give them isnt our breastmilk, but teaching them tolerance, understanding and support for their fellows, isnt it?
I hope so.
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@Emma
…but isn’t that what formula feeding is? It’s certainly not on an equal playing field with breastfeeding, so why shouldn’t it be called out as not as good? No one here is demonizing those that don’t breastfeed, but it’s certainly not a “whatever you choose will work out just as well” situation.
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I understand this woman is the deputy editor of the magazine and that this article is below standard for someone of her credentials but why on earth does one badly expressed article make the whole magazine Anti-Breastfeeding?
That’s something of an over-reaction. Some mothers BF and some FF and some combine BF/FF their children and every single one has her own very good reasons for making her own choice.
It’s not irresponsible or anti breastfeeding for a national magazine to acknowledge that FF is a valid way to feed your child.
Perhaps they should have made it clear who was writing the article and they certainly should have made sure the deputy editor was capable of writing one that wasn’t filled with such stupid words and phrases as “fun bags” but now matter how much you believe breast is best you can’t in fairness say that this one article makes the entire magazine anti-breastfeeding as it clearly isn’t and a knee-jerk facebook campaign asking them to support breastfeeding at the expense of also supporting formula feeding is unfair.
The readership of the magazine is more than likely equally covered by both BF and FF mothers and ALL of them deserve equal support in the magazine.
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I cannot believe this article ever went to print. What a disgraceful piece drivel in a prominent magazine. How do the columists ever get this into print because it isnt even written properly. To refer to a hungry child as a ‘bawling baby’ is insensitive to say the least. Breast is for feeding a baby. There is plenty of time for it to be considered a ‘lovers sex thing’. It is not even factual. I breast fed my two boys for well over nine months and my breasts do not reach my navel. I got my figure back and it was a very convenient method of ‘food on tap’
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I am shocked and stunned at this whole issue. I am proud to say that I have breastfed all three of my children and have even managed to donate milk to the prem-babies at Chester hospital.
Surely having a drink can wait until after feeding your beautiful new baby. I have concerns that if this is opinion of this woman, what did she do when pregnant?
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I think she should be appaulded- not all women want to breast feed and it is refreshing to have someone who will stand up and say how she felt letting other people who feel the same that they are not alone.
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I was really depressed when I read this article. It actually cooincided with an old work colleague asking me last week if “breast feeding is really as disgusting as it sounds?!” I am just so disappointed in this attitude – I think because I niaivly didn’t realise it existed. I loved breast feeding my baby until he was 4 months and have just had to give up to go back on some medication. I was really devestated to have to do this. It was a struggle to start to breast feed in the first place because my baby was in intesive care and was tube fed and then bottle fed for the first few days. So giving up b/feeding was even more upsetting given that it was so hard to start in the first place.
I am really puzzled by Blundell’s quite sick attitude. Would she have the same attitude to kissing her baby/child on the lips?! Very strange.
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This article makes me really sad. My parents and family members had similar negative attitudes towards breastfeeding, but I was so determined to feed my little boy and I’m pleased to say that I successfully breastfed him for 6-and-a-half months. Yes, it was tough going and this deputy editor is right in saying that there are many ‘horror’ stories surrounding breastfeeding… I, too, had to endure hours and hours of feeding in the early days and, even towards the end of the 6 months I breastfed for, he was still on hourly feeds. But… anything that is worth doing is never easy, is it?! I decided to become a mother and, therefore, put my baby’s needs before mine (at least in the short term). Isn’t that what parents do??!! I can see the author of this article resigning (or else being encouraged to by the magaine!) by the end of the week. She would fit in well in many other magazines.. just not one that is supposed to support the health and wellbeing of mothers and their offspring!
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What a bunch of uptight women you are! Shocked and horrified are you? God,you have obviously led a sheltered life to react in such a way. Haven’t you heard of irony or does that bypass what passes for your sense of humour.
Forumla milk isn’t poison,Danielle.You say to Emma isn’t that what it is? No,it may not be the same as breastmilk,but hardly poison.
As for those of you hiding the mags in shops.well have your opinions,but let others have theirs.
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Obviously I can see some women are so wrapped up in their carreers a child is a side show, that’s sad and the artical written by the deputy editor of the mother & baby mag was vile, sick and disgusting, that woman does not care about babies or children, she’s a witch.
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Sorry guys and gals – whilst the positioning of the article may’ve been unfortunate given the magazine, it is just one woman’s account of a feeding attitude. We applaud balanced views in most things; breast/bottle should be no different. Having a child goes way beyond the first six months of feeding and there really is nothing wrong with wanting your body back.
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I just can’t except that. Breast-feeding is the most natural thing in the world. Surely people want the best for their children and it is the best way to get your body back to your original size!!!Having a child goes way beyond the first six months you are absolutely right so think about the the poor child whose mother thinks more about herself than her child and the article certainly suggests that. It was an appalling article and the lady in question certainly shouldn’t be editor of such a magazine.
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It’s you lot that disgust me not the writer of that article!!! You are the same rude, uptight, judgemental women who give me the evils in a coffee shop as I bottle feed my daughter as you so proudly have your 4 year old shoved under your tops! Indeed, breast is best but some of us aren’t lucky enough for it to work for us. This is one woman expressing her own personal opinion, whilst I don’t agree with her 100% I found it incredibly refreshing. Get over it and get a life for gods sake!!!
I have actually be ‘tutted’ at by a woman when feeding my child and when my daughter was 9 weeks old I had someone mutter ‘poor baby’ under her breath! Did these women know that it was completely my intention to breast feed, I had it highlighted on my birthplan that I wanted my baby to be put straight to the breast after birth regardless o howy birth went (c sec etc) but aftr 4 days of labour and a very scary and traumatic birth ( we thought we were going to lose her) I was drugged up to the eyeballs and being sent for MrI scans and it took SIX HOURS fr someone to help me feed my baby, by that stage she was too tired to latch properly so I hand expressed the colostrum and feed it to her via a syringe. Over the next 5 days I had 7 different people grabbing my breast, shoving it in my childs mouth and the walking away! She never latched. Correctly so I started using breast sheilds to help her. We nursed every hour for three weeks, I took her to get weighed and we discovered at 3 weeks old that she was still under her birth weight! After a scary rich to A&E we were advised to start topping up each feed with formula. We started to gain weight but also rejected me in favour of the bottle. So I pumped for 5 weeks, by week 4 of pumping my milk supply was decreasing, I bought 2 more pumps in the hopes they would help, but they didn’t. By week 5 of pumping I was ppimg for a total of 6 hours a day for ONE 5oz bottle!!!!
So before you judge formula feeders please realise that you don’t know everyones story, women like me feel bad enough without added guilt from the breast feeding mafia (who strangely seem to think they know best about many things!). Just because you succeeded at bfing does not make you a better mother than me.
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In nearly every other aspect of parenting, people accept that what works for one family might not work for another. Yet when it comes to breast feeding, so many advocates insist their way is best, creating pressure and guilt for those mothers who, for whatever reason, choose to bottle feed.
There’s a good page on the issue here:
http://www.squidoo.com/breast-feeding-sucks
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for god sakes get on with your own lives and stop judging others everyone is entitled to their own opinion.so its ok to have all pro babysitting articles but no negative experiences printed? we live in country of free speech! there are so many other factors which influence whether a baby grows in to a happy, healthy child the most improtant thing is that it is loved cared for and not abused or neglected.im sure this woman is a very loving mother just because she dosent like the idea of brest feeding SO WHAT!many other women dont either for whatever reason they want articles they can identify with too and as for hiding the magazines at he back seriously?get a hobbie!
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as for breastfeeding a four year old i find that incredibly creepy eurghhhh that is definatly for your benifit not the childs!
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